Gets Better....

I am a huge Gleek. I have watched every episode and actually have discussions with friends about Glee, the stories, the plots, etc... Now, Master, before You decide to not read this entry because it is about Glee, it is not about Glee, it is about my thoughts, lol.
This week's episode, the winter finale, really hit home, it struck a chord with me for many reasons. Not just the teenage suicide attempt but also the really struggling with your sexual identity, acceptance, admitting who you are. These are things one has to deal with when they are not what is considered "normal" by society.
When I was in high school, I had those feelings, I took a trip to that deep dark place where I didn't think I could return from, I contemplated ending it all. I was different, I was not gay but not straight, or at least that's what I thought at the time. I had a strange affinity for pain, humiliation, and all sorts of things that were taboo. I, honestly, at that time, thought I was defective.
Looking back now on those times, the way I felt, I really can't pin point one thing that sent me to that dark place, what made me snap, or what made me think those thoughts, I can't really even pin point what brought me out of the fog, or what saved me from myself, but something or someone did.
I can't help but think that, had he still been alive, P and I would have been very active in the It Gets Better campaign or that the crazy son of a bitch would have found a way to become involved with the original monster herself and would have been very active in the Born This Way Foundation. (Can you imagine the Born This Way video or Edge of Glory having pointe work in the video?)
I have been asked a few times to do an It Gets Better PSA in P's memory. I have been considering it lately, especially after seeing this week's Glee. I think, as an adult, as a parent, as a role model, it is our responsibility to remind young people things do get better then they may seem now.
How much better would life and society be if people like me, like P, like J, hell, like so many of our friends, could be and true to who they are, no matter their sexual preference, their affection preference, their gender, or anything about them. Maybe, one day, we can stop tens from taking their own lives because they just couldn't take the bullies, the torment, the utter terror of knowing they go to school every day and have to face that.
It doesn't always get as bad as it did for Korovsky this week, sometimes it is just words, sometimes silent threats or looks, other times there is violence. Honestly, I don't know if I would have been strong enough to make it, to overcome, if I had been forced to face cyber bullies. I don't know if P would have been able to face it all, I don't know if he would have been as strong if he were forced to live in fear of someone posting nasty comments on facebook or twitter when he was coming out.
I look at what i have now, today, everything the goddess has blessed me with, everything my family has been blessed with, and I am so thankful that I was snapped out of that deep dark place.
I know it sounds kind of hokey, but I really do hope there is a time, soon, when my son can walk the hallways of school and not be worried that he will be judged for his parents' affection preference, or for his mother's sexual preference. I hope there is a day when there is no such thing as bullies who torment kids because they are different or because the bully is scared and hiding that he or she is different, like Korovsky did.