Pregnancy and BDSM

Reading the blog of the wife of an old friend, I started thinking. I know, dangerous, right? Can you all see the smoke? (Ok, Master's jokes out of the way).
There is a lot of information out there about R.A.C.K. and S.S.C. when it comes to every day kink and every day lifestyles, but what about when a woman is pregnant? How does pregnancy effect a power exchange relationship?
There are some who think the relationship dynamic has to change, that one has to give up a power exchange relationship completely if you are pregnant, especially if it is the submissive partner who is pregnant. But, is that true? Can you still engage in kink while pregnant? I, personally, have engaged in some form of kink throughout three pregnancies, two of which ended in unintentional orgasmic births. So, it can be done, and is often done, subs and slaves do become pregnant and do continue to live their role.
It is almost impossible to name every single kink and say if it is good or bad during pregnancy, so I have chosen a few that are the most popular. When in doubt, use the common sense test, if you think there is any chance of it harming the baby, then the answer is do not do it.
It helps if you find a kink-friendly doctor (any readers in Alaska, I can give you the name of a wonderful doctor/midwife team, the doctor was my doctor when we lived there and he is kink friendly, lol). If you can not find a doctor who is kink friendly, do not worry, just follow common sense and be aware of your partner's needs and comfort during each and every scene, and if you are the one who is pregnant, do not be afraid to use your safe word at the first even thought of something being amiss.
There are a few things one would need to stay away from while pregnant.
One big thing to stay away from is breath play. It is NEVER safe to restrict the flow of air to a pregnant woman, no matter how experienced in this kink you may be. Because of the very nature of breath play it is not safe to EVER do while pregnant, no matter how light it is or how experienced you may be. As my doctor friend said "I can not think of anyone who would condone it."
Electricity play is another big no no. Think of it this way, your baby is swimming around in a big bubble filled with water. What happens when you mix electricity and water? So, my fellow slaves, please, no violet wand, shock collars, cattle prods, or bug zapper paddle thingies while pregnant.
Another thing to avoid is whipping. Because of the very nature of the tool, it is hard to say exactly where those ends of the whip will land, no matter how experienced you may be with using a whip. Not even Indiana Jones should whip a submissive who is pregnant. There is too much risk of striking the belly area and harming the baby. This risk only increases as you increase the number of tails on the whip, so if a single tail or bull whip is off limits, so are the cat of nine's, multi tails, and floggers.
Any activity that involves bloodletting is also a bad idea during pregnancy. One false move with a knife can lead to disaster. You are supplying blood to not only yourself but the baby as well, so no bloodletting during pregnancy.
Tight bondage is also a no no. You do not want to do anything with ropes, cuffs, belts, straps, tape, saran wrap etc that will effect the blood flow to your pregnant partner's hands, feet, legs, arms, breasts or belly. This is especially important around the belly area. Suspension bondage is also a given as a no no. Now, ropes and cuffs can be used to create an effect or set the scene, but, please, no tight or strict bondage while pregnant.
Another big no no is consensual non-consent. Yes, that is what you think it is. NO rape play. The very nature of this kind of activity is a very violent one, both physically and mentally. You do not want to cause any unintentional physical pain to your pregnant submissive. Also, pregnancy is a very emotional time, and many women who enjoy rape play normally can not handle the mental violence associated with this activity during pregnancy.
For you rubber and latex suit fans, hold off on this kink until after the baby. The restriction of these suits are not good for a pregnant mom and, if worn for extended periods of time, can actually hide symptoms of potentially fatal pregnancy complications such as swelling of the legs and feet, which can mean toxemia.
I know this sounds like a lot of don't's. So, how can you still be kinky during pregnancy? Here are some ways that have proven useful to either Master and I or friends of ours.
It may not seem kinky to fetishists, but even the simple act of a facial or cum-shot can be very submissive. It can also make oral sex a little more kinky.
Orgasm control, as long as you have not been advised against orgasm (as I was) is always fun to play with. Stimulating until just at the edge then backing off until given permission from your Dominant partner can provide that masochism many submissives need. This ability and training can also come into play after the baby is born.
Erotic writing. Write a story for your Dominant partner about the fetishes and kinks you are wanting to try once the baby is born. The more graphic the story the better.
Pet play is also ok during pregnancy provided the above guidelines are followed. When I was pregnant, there was nothing better then curling up (as much as my belly would allow) and nuzzling into Master's side. It was during my last pregnancy that I really discovered Kitten Me. What better reason to be a pampered pet and spoiled kitty then being pregnant?
Foot worship is still permitted, although entering the vagina with the toe or foot is not advised. But you can still lick, kiss and/or suck feet and toes.
If you are a pain slut like me, and you need at least a little pain every so often,you can still get it, just not as often and not as much. Open handed spanking and paddles are ok, as long as they stay backside down. So, back of the thighs? Yes. Breasts? No. Same goes for clamps. Clit clamps, ok in moderation, nipple clamps, probably not, and definitely no clamps with weights, so put the lead tear drops away for a few months (I know, it stinks, but think of your baby).
Care should be taken when keeping a pregnant submissive in one position too long and sexual play should be stopped if she is feeling any discomfort at all.
As with anything, a clear head is needed and common sense to keep a TPE or kink relationship during pregnancy.





*Thanks Dr E for confirming some of this for me either way back when or recently. I know Master and I appreciated it then and my readers appreciate it now!